Day 43 - The Rocking Chair

When I was pregnant with Henry, one of the mandatory baby items on our list was a rocking chair/recliner for his room.  A lot of people recommended getting a more traditional glider chair, but I knew that we would be more happy to have the recliner/rocker.  We found one at one of the large baby retailers.  It's not much to look at (just a standard tan chair), but that chair has been very very well-loved over the years.

I was still pregnant when we first got the chair.  We carefully tucked it away in the room that we were working on for him, and I would find myself sitting in that chair at random times during the day and night.  I would rock back and forth and think about the little life that was going to be using that room in a few short months.  I would look at all of the decorations that we were working on for his room, and I would daydream about rocking him and reading him books in that chair.

Those dreams all came true.  I sat with him in that chair on the first day that we brought him home from the hospital, and there have been few days since that his rocking chair has gone unused.  Mike and I both logged countless hours in that chair with a sleeping baby on our chest both because there were times when he wouldn't sleep in his crib and times when we simply wanted to hold him in our arms.  I've slept with Henry in that chair when he's been flushed with fever, making us both sweat. I've sat in that chair watching him sleep.  I've cried in that chair a lot of times (as recently as last night) from so many emotions - happiness, uncertainty, fear, overwhelming love, frustration.

We've read so many books in that chair, and we started when he was a tiny tiny baby.  He loves reading books at night, and I love reading to him.  It is one of my favorite things to do.   Sometimes the books are silly, sometimes they are sweet, and sometimes they are downright funny.  I like some more than others, of course, but will read any of them to him anytime he wants.  I grew up surrounded by books and still love to read today.  I am glad that Henry shares that love.

Trying to put a mother's love into words is impossible.  Words do not exist that can describe the feelings that a mother has for her child.  Being a mother is the greatest thing that I have ever done and the greatest thing that I will ever do.  I am so lucky to be Henry's mom.  He is sweet, bright, funny, challenging at times, loving, curious, and just plain adorable (I know that I am contractually obligated to think that, but he's just really cute).

I'll always cherish the memories that I have from the rocking chair in Henry's room and am happy that he will still humor me with a rock and a snuggle.  We barely fit anymore because he is getting so big, but I'll squeeze.  Funny how a very simple piece of furniture can become so special. 

I was pretty much a mess writing this post.  I always have, always will think this way, but the thoughts have been amplified lately.  I've been very emotional this week, in general, and was a huge sap yesterday and today. I can't really blame hormones (or can I) since the Lupron injection that I get basically puts me into medically-induced menopause so I'll just blame being full of love for my sweet little boy.

Speaking of love, Mike's parents arrived from Virginia this afternoon.  I have not seen them since well before Day 1 so it was emotional (those damn emotions are really showing up in this blog post) to see them. I am very glad that they are here.