Day 47 - Workout

Man, I felt great today.  Woke up before my alarm, ate like a normal human, had a lot of energy, got a ton accomplished at work, and overall had a really great day.  I am so happy about my great day!  Not feeling terribly well on a fairly consistent basis really makes me appreciate the days when I do feel well.  Funny how cancer makes me appreciate things that I would not have given a second thought before Day 1.  Pre-cancer, I certainly took my good health for granted, and I know that I will never ever do that again.

Cancer has changed me.

Part of my great day included a trip to the gym tonight!  I went to an 8pm class with one of my favorite trainers, and it was awesome. I've still got some soreness around my port (I guess that makes sense considering it is completely foreign to my body), but I was able to push myself harder at the gym than I anticipated. I even ran a tiny bit.  It really felt great to get in a pretty hard workout.

I tried to not focus on tomorrow during the day today, but tomorrow definitely crept into some of my thoughts and was hanging like a bit of a black cloud.  Tomorrow is an important day, but I am not looking forward to feeling the way that chemo makes me feel.  I think that it is safe to expect for this round to be worse than the last as chemo does have a cumulative effect.  I do know that I will sit in that chair with a smile on my face, I will crack jokes with Mike and the nurses, and I will embrace the medicine that is working to make me better.  It's hard to dread chemo too badly since it is an important step in getting this very unwelcome cancer out of my body.

Someone posted in one of my Facebook groups that she is considering decline chemo for her stage 2, grade 3 (grade 3 = aggressive) cancer because she "does not want to deal with the side effects."  I don't judge because everyone's journey is very different, but that concept is very foreign to me.  No, I don't want to deal with the side effects either, but I also don't want cancer so chemo it is.  Chemo gives me the very best chance of shrinking/killing my tumor as well as any other cancer cells that made their way elsewhere in my body so BRING IT ON.

I reserve the right to whine about it as necessary later in the week.